A Gloomy Day In February

 
My fireplace mantel in the library...the room that I painted burgundy a few weeks past...all decked out for Valentine's Day.  I won't show you where I spilled burgundy paint all over the white rug, but I will tell you this.  Did you know that watered down burgundy and white...makes pink! 

I would love to sit here and write something profound tonight, but my mind is tired and I think that I am coming down with a cold (Teresa, I am hoping it is not the same virus that you had).  If there is ever a month that I veer toward depression, February is it.  

It is the month that I have resigned from jobs, cut my hair, rearranged every room in the house and pulled up and threw out the wall to wall carpet.  It is the month my father died and I am sure that it is the month that my husband feels like murdering me (just ask him).

Today was one of those gray February days that made me long for spring.  And tonight I found a poem by Ruth Bell Graham that perfectly illustrated how I felt today...

Not fears

I need deliverance from

today--

but nothingness;

inertia,

skies gray

and windless;

no sun,

no rain,

no stab of joy

no pain,

no strong regret,

no reaching after,

no tears,

no laughter,

no black despair,

no bliss.

Deliver me

today

. . . from this.

( by Ruth Bell Graham in "Footprints of a Pilgrim" which I believe is available from Billy Graham.org)

Now tomorrow should be better because I think that the sun is supposed to shine, but if it doesn't...that white carpet turned pink with the burgundy paint is a goner.  And you will find me smiling as I throw it in the back of the pickup and haul it off to the dump!  Or maybe I will settle for something less drastic, like a trip to the greenhouse nursery to smell soil and peat and things growing...whatever it takes to survive a gloomy day in February!  DLB